At this time, let’s revisit the question presented at the beginning. Recall the exasperated parent asking, “Why can’t you just do what I told you to do?” On the surface, it appears that the difference lies between hearing and listening. Hearing involves the registration of sound waves through the eardrum which stimulates particular parts of the brain. Listening involves that step, but goes a bit further. Listening involves understanding or comprehension, this means knowing what was said, and to go a bit further, responding to what was said in a way that the speaker intended. Part of listening, whether we like it or not, involves both understanding and motivation. Would it be sufficient for understanding without some response to follow? How would we know that the person, or in this case, the child, has understood what we said? What about motivation to listen? Motivators/reinforcers are idiosyncratic to the individual. Although we would like our parental approval to be sufficient to motivate, sometimes it’s just not enough depending on the request. If we turn our focus back to what needs to improve, one sees that in order to complete the task requested, some level of self-awareness is needed (i.e., answering the question: do I understand the request and am I on track with complying with the request), attention to the instruction and working memory to verbally remind oneself of what to do, inhibition and impulse control (think delayed gratification), and planning (i.e., the steps the child follows to complete the steps).
When one looks at the list of skills needed to complete a simple task, it is a wonder that anything gets done! However, supports can be provided externally by the environment (of which parents are a part) while behavioral skills are acquired, practiced, generalized, and maintained across many different circumstances. What is to be done? First, secure attention; second, make sure the child understands what is being asked; third, focus on consequences (i.e., what happens when you follow my directions?), and reinforce immediately once successful (i.e., pay attention to what happens when the child correctly executes the instruction).
The ADHD journey can be arduous at times. In those moments, take a deep breath, reflect on what has worked in the past to help change behavior, connect to what kind of parent you want to be for your child, and follow through. When in doubt, you may find that seeking additional strategies from a trained professional, linking to an organization such as CHAAD, and/or joining a local community parent support group can help guide you along the path.
ADHD Series by Dr. Glenn Sloman
Continue reading using the links below:
- What Is ADHD? Part 1
- ADHD Symptoms Part 2
- Who is Diagnosed with ADHD? Part 3
- Executive Functioning Part 4
- Another Way of Looking at Impulsivity Part 5
- Promoting Success with ADHD Part 6
References
Attention-Deficit / Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). (2017, July 18). Retrieved October 02, 2017, from https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/adhd
Biederman, J. et al. (April 2010). Adult Psychiatric Outcomes of Girls with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder: 11-Year Follow-Up in a Longitudinal Case-Control Study. American Journal of Psychiatry 167(4):409-417.
Biederman, J. at al. (July 2012). Adult outcome of attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder: a controlled 16-year follow-up study. Journal of Clinical Psychiatry 73(7):941-50.
CHADD – The National Resource on ADHD. (n.d.). General Prevalence of ADHD | CHADD. Retrieved October 02, 2017, from http://www.chadd.org/understanding-adhd/about-adhd
Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders DSM-5. (2013). Arlington, VA: American Psychiatric Association.
Najdowski, A. C. (2017). Flexible and focused: Teaching executive functioning skills to individuals with autism and attention disorders. San Diego, CA: Academic Press.
Thapar A, Cooper M, Jefferies R, et al. What causes attention deficit hyperactivity disorder? Archives of Disease in Childhood 2012; 97:260-265.
The Understood Team. (n.d.). 3 Areas of Executive Function. Retrieved October 02, 2017, from https://www.understood.org/en/learning-attention-issues/child-learning-disabilities/executive-functioning-issues/3-areas-of-executive-function
About The Author
Glenn M. Sloman, Ph.D., BCBA-D, NSCP is a Licensed Psychologist in New Jersey and Pennsylvania and a Board Certified Behavior Analyst at the Doctoral level. Dr. Sloman is also a Nationally Certified School Psychologist and a Certified School Psychologist in New Jersey. He earned his undergraduate degrees with honors in Psychology and Anthropology at the University of Florida. Dr. Sloman attained his Master’s in Education and Ph.D. in School Psychology at the University of Florida where he specialized in Behavior Analysis. He previously served as a program coordinator for Douglass Developmental Disabilities Center Outreach Program and supervisor of home staff in programming for individuals with an Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). Dr. Sloman has worked in New Jersey school districts as a case manager and school psychologist on a child study team developing and implementing individualized education programs (IEPs) and behavior improvement plans (BIPs), providing individual and group psychotherapy, social skills training, and staff and parent consultation.
Dr. Sloman is skilled in conducting psychological and psychoeducational evaluations, and functional behavior assessments (FBAs). He has experience providing outpatient psychotherapy to children, adolescents, and adults from ethnically and economically diverse backgrounds, and providing parent support and training.
Dr. Sloman has extensive experience in the treatment of children through adults who present with symptoms of anxiety, depression, ADHD, ASD, learning disabilities, oppositional defiant disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, mood disorders, and social skills deficits. He also has expertise assisting individuals transitioning from high school to college life.
Dr. Sloman’s professional interests include Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) and applying Behavior Analysis in treatment and consultation. Dr. Sloman’s goals for his clients are to increase their psychological flexibility in pursuit of doing what matters to them and creating meaningful behavior change. He is a member of the American Psychological Association, the New Jersey Psychological Association, and the Association for Contextual Behavioral Science.
